A little birdie told me you desperately want to be a Self StartHER, but you’re a bit afraid to start.
That’s totally normal – I was there, too!
If you’re anything like me, you likely have a thousand ideas swirling around in your head. You’ve got dreams so big they scare you and ambitions that make you feel like you’re on the verge of something incredible…but there’s that little bit of doubt that keeps creeping in.
One of my podcast guests, Dena Patton, calls this doubt your smallness. It says things like “what if it doesn’t work” or “what if I fail”…
We all have this doubt, or smallness. In fact, it’s there to protect us. However, many times it’s actually doing just the opposite – it’s making us afraid to start and preventing us from truly tapping into our full potential.
And, the fact that you’re here tells me that you are ready to tell this smallness to take a hike!
So, let’s unpack a few reasons why you may be afraid to start and, more importantly, how you can finally take that action you desire!
1. Fear of Failure
What? You say failure like it’s a bad thing!
In all seriousness, failure is number one for a reason. It’s a word that may cause your palms to sweat or your heart to start beating more quickly…
Failure is something that many of us spend so much time avoiding, but guess what?!
Failure is a part of the process!
Think about it…Every woman that you have admired has “failed” (yes, I put it in quotes because the only failure is never really going for it!) at some point in their life.
J.K. Rowling was rejected by 12 publishers before Harry Potter found a home. Now, it’s a global phenomenon.
Oprah was fired from her first job at a TV anchor and later went on to have the highest-rated talk show in American TV history!
Sara Blakely was turned down by every hosiery mill in North Carolina and now Spanx is a billion dollar company.
I imagine all of these women were afraid to start – but, what if they let that fear stop them from pursuing their dreams…
The world would be a bit different, right?
Now, imagine if you pursue your dream. And, when “failure” kicks in, you don’t quit – instead, you learn, grow and get better. Feels good – doesn’t it!
Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s part of the journey – embrace it!
2. Fear of Success
You’re likely thinking, “huh?? Why would someone be afraid of success?”
Believe me, it’s real!
Over the past few years, I’ve interviewed 100+ women about their journeys towards “success” and many of them had the same concerns…
“What happens if it all works out?”
“What if I actually achieve my dreams?”
Sometimes the thought of success is just as terrifying as the thought of failure.
Why?
With success comes change – more responsibilities, new challenges, higher expectations. But, it also comes with fulfillment, growth, and the realization of your dreams.
Please – don’t let the fear of success hold you back.
Embrace the possibility that you might actually get everything you’ve ever wanted!
3. The Comfort Zone
Ah, the good old comfort zone…I know it too well.
As I’m sitting here writing, I’m currently in my comfort zone: at my cozy home, in my cozy (stretchy) pants, wearing socks (I have the world’s coldest feet!) and sitting on my window seat with the warm sun beaming across the side of my body.
I’m comfortable. It’s safe. It’s predictable.
But guess what?
I know that, in order to truly live my best life and get all the things I really want, I can’t stay in my cozy bubble all day. Instead, I need to step outside (literally and figuratively).
Because…nothing amazing or transformative happens in your comfort zone.
We all love our comfort zones, but if we just stay in them forever we’re not growing, not challenging ourselves, and not reaching for more.
Stepping outside of our comfort zone is where the true magic happens.
And, I don’t know about you…but I feel so dang proud of myself and invigorated every time I step outside.
3. Perfectionism
Have you ever seen Mean Girls?
You know the scene where Cady (aka Lindsay Lohan) is tasked with solving a complex math problem?
And, she says…”The limit does not exist!”
You see where I’m going with this? Yep…perfection doesn’t exist, either.
As women, we often feel we’re supposed to be everything to everyone, right? The perfect mom, the perfect employee, the perfect wife, friend, sister—you name it.
It’s no wonder the thought of starting something new feels overwhelming!
But here’s the thing: you don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be you.
The world needs more of you. And, if you let perfectionism hold you back – the world is truly missing out!
4. Impostor Syndrome
Every heard of imposter syndrome?
It’s that nagging feeling that you’re not good enough – that you don’t deserve your success – or that you’ve been faking it and at any minute someone’s going to find out!
It’s basically an uninvited guest at your confidence party!
Remember that “smallness” I was talking about before. This is another part of it…
Impostor syndrome is full of lies!
You are more than capable. You’re hardworking, ambitious, and you’ve got this far, haven’t you? That’s not by accident.
Every woman out there, even the ones at the top of their game, has felt like an impostor at some point.
The key is to push through it, to keep showing up even when you don’t feel like you’re enough because, guess what?
You are enough.
5. Timing
We’ve all said it: “I’ll start when the time is right.”
A little reality check here… there’s never going to be a perfect time. It’s just another excuse because you’re afraid to start.
Life is messy, unpredictable, and full of surprises and, iIf you wait for everything to line up perfectly, you’ll be waiting forever.
The best time to start is NOW, with whatever you have.
You don’t need to have everything figured out. Just take the first step (the hardest part!)
It might be a small one, but it’s a step forward.
You’ll learn as you go…and guess what? You’re allowed to change course, to adjust, to pivot.
But, you’ve got to start.
6. Doing it Alone
One of the biggest reasons women are afraid to start something new is the fear of doing it alone.
Heck, women even go to the bathroom as a group!
But here’s a little secret that I’ve learned since starting my podcast: you’re not alone.
There’s a whole community of women out there who are going through the same things, facing the same fears, and wanting the same things.
That’s where my podcast, Self StartHER, comes in. It’s a place for women like you—dreamers, doers, go-getters—to come together, share their stories, and support each other.
Whether you’re thinking about starting a business, making a career change, or just want to be inspired by other amazing women, this is the place for you. You don’t have to do this alone. We’re in this together.
Let’s Get Started!
Let me let you in on a little secret…you’ve got everything you need to start right now.
Starting something new is never easy, but it’s always worth it.
You’ve got dreams that deserve to be chased, and a life that’s meant to be lived on your terms.
So, what are you waiting for?
Take that first step.
Whether it’s launching that business, making that career move, or simply pursuing something that lights you up, it’s time to start.
And if you need a little push, a little inspiration, or just want to hear from other women who’ve been where you are, tune into Self StartHER.
We’re here to cheer you on every step of the way!
